In November, I went through a hard breakup with my former girlfriend that totally changed my life. After two and a half years of living with each other and always being together, I was single again. It was a tough transition and I know many of you have come to me because you just got out of a bad breakup or divorce. That is why this article is dedicated to getting over a broken heart and how to get your life back together following a break up. Follow these simple steps to getting over a broken heart and your transition into singlehood will be a bit less intense.
Getting Over a Broken Heart Step 1: Reconnect with friends and family - Friends are great in times of heartbreak. They are our support system that keeps us afloat in rough waters. The day of the breakup and the weeks following, you should spend time with close friends and family. Though breakups suck, they do a great job in building stronger bonds between your family and friends. They will help you feel better when you are down.
Getting Over a Broken Heart Step 2: Go out - Spending the weekend alone in your room will make you miserable. Now that you're single, go out! You're going to be doing this a lot more often now that you're single so let's get the party started! You do not need to rebound right away if you aren't ready for it, but get accustomed to partying and meeting new people. You are building a new life as a single person. You will make new friends and build your social circle. This is especially important if most of your friends were your ex's friends or you lost most of your friends because you spent all of your time with your ex.
Getting Over a Broken Heart Step 3: Focus on yourself - You have to stop thinking about your relationship and start thinking about yourself. Set some goals you would like to accomplish. Take up hobbies you used to do as a single person. Start exercising, get a make-over, redecorate your home, or even begin a new career.
Getting Over a Broken Heart Step 4: Stay busy - Though depression and sadness is inevitable, the more you stay busy, the less you will obsess over the breakup. It's healthy to release your sadness and grieve, but when you lock yourself in a closet and eat ice cream, stare at anniversary pictures, and recite letters from your ex, you're making yourself suffer. However, don't stay so busy that you don't allow yourself to grieve and reflect on what you've learned from the relationship because you will prolong the grieving process.
Getting Over a Broken Heart Step 5: Let bygones be bygones - The most important thing to do is to accept what happened and move on. Do not regret what happened because you can't change the past. Learn from your mistakes and mature. Hating your ex can be an easy way to get over the person, but if you have any intentions on staying friends, it will not work if you harbor resentment. Remember, forgiveness benefits you, not the transgressor. Forgiveness and acceptance is the last and final step that must take place before you can fully recover from a breakup. You don't want to get into your next relationship with emotional baggage. It's not fair to the other person and it's bad for you psychologically. If you're still communicating with your ex and want him or her back, or perhaps you need help getting over a broken heart, consider taking phone consultations with me to coach you through these tough times.
Your Matchmaker and Dating Coach,
Dan Silverman
