Many people listen to affirmation tapes to improve their confidence and inner game. Inner coaching helps them incorporate powerful positive beliefs into their mind. An example of an affirmation is Women love it when I approach them or I am a prize and a catch to women. However, most people do not find success with affirmations. Many premade affirmation tapes sold by inner coaching companies are hocus pocus, new agey, and useless with all these special effects and weird sounds. Affirmations can help you overcome your fears of approaching women and build confidence, but in order to work, the affirmations must be positive and non-limiting, goal oriented, and evoke confident emotions inside of you.
Positive and Non-Limiting - For an affirmation to work with inner coaching, it must be positive in nature and non-limiting. For example, instead of saying, Women who reject me are stupid and I shouldn't care what they think, you can say, The only women I want are women who can see quality when it's in front of them. The first affirmation harbors resentment towards women who reject you. The second affirmation focuses on women who you want. It also never mentions the word "rejection" Negative words should never be used in inner coaching.
Goal Oriented - Many people make the mistake of creating affirmations that seem great, but only serve to keep reminding you of your insecurities. Take for example this affirmation, I will overcome my approach anxiety. The problem with this affirmation is that it attempts to avoid the obstacle instead of reaching a goal. It would be much better to say, I love approaching women. There is no mention of approach anxiety, which is the obstacle. Instead, we are focusing on the end goal, enjoying the process of approaching women.
Evoke Confident Emotions - What good is an affirmation if it doesn't make you feel confident? What affirmation will make you feel more of an emotional response, Women are attracted to me or Women salivate at the sight of me? Although the second affirmation is exaggerated, it may prove to make you feel more confident. In order to make any progress with inner coaching and affirmations, you must listen to them on a daily basis. Listen to them while driving, exercising, and before you go to sleep. Visualize your affirmations coming true. Visualize the process of becoming true. For example, if your affirmation is, “I love approaching women, imagine yourself having a great time while you are out with women making eye contact with you and smiling. See women desiring you and imagine yourself approaching them while feeling confident. If you do this inner coaching while you are listening to your affirmations, it will make them that much stronger. To learn more about how to improve your inner game and inner coaching with affirmations, check out my
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Your Matchmaker and Dating Coach,
Dan Silverman
